Max & Ruby … More Debauchery

I should really be outraged, but instead I’m mildly amused.  And semi-outraged.  Semi-mildly-outraged-amused-like.  And you already know the disdain I have in my heart for these wayward, parentless rabbits, Max & Ruby.

The Boy has this book “Max’s Halloween.”  (That’s my fault.  I bought it before I read it!)  I feel that it sends a terrible message & I’ve tried to hide the book, (though I’ve learned my lesson about straight up trashing things of his that I don’t like – I end up having to deal with a sobbing mess of a child and then repurchase whatever it was that I had originally gotten rid of, not to mention the wrath of The Husband who fails to understand why we don’t need 29 tiny plastic dollar store slinkies.)  Well, this time I simply hid the book. Yeah, that didn’t work.  The Boy is like Indiana Jones in the Temple of Max & Ruby.

When The Boy cannot have something he becomes singularly fixated, and will make it his sole purpose in life to attain whatever it is he is not able to have.  Gee, I wonder where he got THAT from?

So, here’s a little excerpt from this wanton book … YOU TELL ME!!!!

Highly inappropriate teachings!  | The Fairly Good Mother
Highly inappropriate teachings from Rosemary Wells! | The Fairly Good Mother

The text to the left of this page reads: “Mr. Huffington filled their jack-o’-lanterns with gummy toads.  Then he stuffed a few extra toads in Max’s costume.”

I’m sorry …  WHAT???   I’m so NOT a prude, but Come.The Hell.On!  This is teaching my child, A) to accept gummy toads from some crazed looking rabbit-man wearing a bow tie, with his eyes rolled to the back of his head in ecstasy, and B) to allow crazed rabbit-man to stuff said toads into his fricking halloween costume!!!!  All while his clueless sister counts her candy!!!!!  WTF!?!?  The whole scenario screams inappropriate!!!  The whole situation is unacceptable!!!

Yeah, I’m outraged, but amusingly so.  I mean, I would be simply amused if only The Boy wasn’t so fixated on this book.  He is reading this book as though it were Halloween gospel.  I have since had to drill into his head that we should: A) NEVER accept candy from strange looking bunnies dressed in pin-striped suits;  & B) never let anyone put candy in our costumes & C) never put candy in our costumes in general because it will ruin our costume.  (***NOTE:  The entire premise of the book is that people are stuffing extra candies in Max’s costume throughout his Halloween escapades. Seriously. I can come up with better story lines than this!!)

Thank you, once again, Rosemary Wells, for your tainted debauchery!  Burn books??  Never thought I’d be on THAT bandwagon, but yeah, let’s start with Max & Ruby books!!

Read Across America: A Few Children’s Book Recommendations …

In honor of NEA’s Read Across America Day, which is on Friday, March 1st,  I thought it would be fun to share a few of The Boy’s favorite books.

See, not all of my posts are psychopathic rants about bleeding and cough syrup!

Read!
Words!

Here at our house, we all love to read.  The Husband and I started reading to The Boy while he was still in my belly & never stopped.  We read him Dr. Seuess, “Oh The Places You’ll Go.” while he was incubating 🙂

We read before naps & bedtime, as well as any other time the mood strikes us.  The Boy will find a book that he loves, and read it until we all have every word memorized & the story is “worn out.”  Here’s a few of the current favorites …

Calvin Can’t Fly by Jennifer Berne, Keith Bendis (illustrator) is a charming tale of an awkward bird named Calvin. The Boy & I love this book, as it really highlights the fact that even though someone is different, they still have a contribution to make.  Calvin goes from weirdo to hero in this delightful tale with colorful illustrations.  It’s a fun read with a great message.

Swimmy by Leo Lionni gorgeous & imaginative illustrations are the backdrop for this tale about a fish who is swimming solo in the deep sea after losing his friends to the gulp of a big tuna fish.  As Swimmy explores the ocean world, he finds a school of fish like the one he lost & teaches them how to overcome their fears by working together.  The Boy knows all the words to this book & if I mess up a line or skip a word, he is quick to correct me.swimmyart

Mommy? By Maurice Sendak This one doesn’t really have any words besides “Mommy?”  It’s about a little boy looking for his mommy in a house full of monsters, mummies and ghouls.    Truly an amazing pop-up book by one of my favorite authors.  The illustrations and art in this book are incredible.  And if your little one (or you) loves spooky fun as much as The Boy does, this is sure to be a hit.  It’s fun to make up the story as you turn the page & get your child to describe what’s happening.

I Love You, Stinky Face by Lisa McCourt, Cyd Moore, (illustrator) is a book we’ve been reading since The Boy was 2 years old.  About a child who asks his mother if she’d still love him if he were a stinky skunk, or a meat-eating dinosaur or a one-eyed monster, and of course, as every good mother agrees, she would love her child no matter what.  It’s gone in and out of rotation over the past year and a half, but it’s one that he loves me to read to him as he imagines himself as each character in the story. Lately we’ve been acting it out together 🙂

Any and all Dr. Seuss books ~ we pretty much have about 89% of the collection.  Every book is a timeless treasure, and The Husband & I love LOVE LOVE that we get to enjoy passing the Suess tales down to The Boy.

Other titles The Boy loves are: Good Night, Good Night Construction Site; Little Owls’ Night,  The Way Back Home, and King Jack & The Dragon … I’m just going to stop there for tonight 🙂

rea day

The goal should be to read at least a chapter per night, (for kids that means a few small books.)  We read at least three books to The Boy & if he’s been “such a good boy,”  we read one more, (totals about 20-30 minutes of story time.)  We’re just starting to get into Peter Rabbit – which I’m super thrilled about, since Beatrix Potter is one of my most favorite authors of all time.  This Easter-time is going to be marvelous …. RABBITS!